One time 20 some years ago, the Butte Muckers won a baseball tournament in Missoula.

This was a big deal because the Muckers were always kind of playing with one hand behind their back. They were Butte’s younger American Legion baseball team, and they played in the Class A.

The Butte Miners, who used to be Butte’s Class AA team, play in the Class A now.

That meant the Muckers were always playing against older players, and they rarely finished at .500 or above. So, winning the tournament was a big deal.

Making things even better was the fact that the Muckers won the tournament while playing all their players fairly equally. Every player on the roster got to see considerable playing time throughout the tournament.

The coach should have been nominated for Coach of The Year honors for pulling that off and winning the tournament.

After the Muckers won the championship game, however, a handful of angry parents verbally jumped the coach as soon as he walked out of the dugout. They were yelling at him because their son did not play enough.

These were not the parents whose players usually didn’t play much, either. They were the parents of the players who were used to playing all the time. They did not like that their sons had to sit on the bench more than usual.

They didn’t care if the team won. They were mad that their sons did not play every single inning.

To his credit, the coach told the parents to take a hike, and he quit on the spot. He was not going to deal with a group of parents like that, and Butte’s Legion program lost one of the greatest baseball minds we have ever known.

To this day, I am baffled by those parents.

One longtime coach once told me that most parents would rather have their son or daughter be named All-State than to have them play on a state championship team. Those Muckers parents sure seemed to prove him correct that day.

Of course, nothing brings out a person’s irrational side like being a sports parent. I have spent the better part of my career laughing at the high school and Legion parents who rail on the coach over playing time.

Then, four years ago, I became a high school sports parent myself, and I have seen a different perspective.

Now, I feel like I am a very rational person. I feel like I almost always put things in proper perspective. Eventually.

Sometimes I might find that perspective right away. More often it is later in the day. Sometimes it takes a week or longer. But I usually get there.

In the moment, though, I can be as nutty as the next guy. I have yelled at referees, and I have found myself angry with coaches who I have considered friends for years. I started to think that coaches with state championships under their belts were complete morons.

I did not tell them that, but I thought it sometimes.

There are still some decisions that I might not ever understand. But I have slowly come to the realization that the coaches are not obligated to give me an explanation.

That is something I knew long before my son started playing for the Butte High Bulldogs. The fog of being a parent, though, sometimes makes it less obvious.

I am not alone. Not by a long shot.

Every parent wants their child to play more, and it is often hard to be a parent of a baseball or softball player who is not getting the playing time we think they deserve.

You can see that as you look into the eyes of other parents at the games. Many of us have had our moments of anger. Most will get over that, but some will not. At least not right away.

Jeff LeProwse, the man who I think saved Butte’s Legion baseball program from fading away, gave me a reminder one time a couple of years ago. He said having your son our daughter be a part of a team is the greatest thing of all.

The players will take so much from the practices and the bus rides. The experience your son or daughter gains by buying into being a part of something bigger than themselves is more valuable than any home run they hit or touchdown they score.

I think I might understand that more than most because, as recently as five years ago, we did not think our son would ever play high school sports.

Back then, my wife and I were taking our son to Salt Lake City and Seattle to see specialists because we feared he might have muscular dystrophy. We thought there was a good chance he could be confined to a wheelchair by now.

He was such a good baseball player in Little League. Then, after a couple of flights to Missoula because of severe asthma attacks, Grady started to gain weight, and the muscles in his legs stopped working. He needed to pull himself into my truck with his arms, and running from the batter’s box to first base would take him about 10 seconds. But he still wanted to play.

In Seattle, we found a doctor who figured out that it was all the asthma medicine that messed with Grady’s body. The doctor figured Grady would grow out of his physical problems.

We took Grady to physical therapists Jake Querciagrossa and Beth Salusso, and they taught him how to run again. That enabled him to continue playing baseball — though he often needed a pinch runner — and he went out for the Butte High football team.

At his physical for his freshman year, Grady stood 5 feet, 4 inches, and he weighed 225 pounds. But he was determined to work. He worked out a ton at the Knights of Columbus, often staying way past his bedtime to get in more reps.

He worked as hard as any player I have ever known, even if some of his coaches did not see that because he preferred to do a lot of the work on his own. He figured it was more effective that way.

By the time of his physical for his senior season last summer, Grady was 6-foot-1 and 190 pounds. In three years, he gained nine inches and dropped 35 pounds. He does not have any problems running now.

Sure, he might have worked that hard to get into shape if he didn’t play football and baseball for the Bulldogs. But it is unlikely.

Playing those sports helped turn his physical life around.

Grady did not get a ton of at bats during his senior baseball season, and it is impossible to get into any kind of hitting grove when you only get one or two at bats a week. If that. Some games he did not play at all, and that was not always easy for a dad working as the team’s public address announcer.

But he was part of the team. He got to bat in the last inning of Butte High’s win that clinched a third-place trophy at the Class AA State tournament, and he reached base. It is the first trophy for a Butte High boys’ team since the Bulldog football team took home second place in 2019.

That trophy will be on display at Butte High forever, and Grady will forever be part of that team. Nobody can ever take that away from him and his teammates.

Likewise, nobody can take away the great memories of the practices, bus rides, wins, losses and important life lessons of playing football and baseball with his teammates. Really, that is what high school sports are all about.

That camaraderie outweighs wins, losses and playing time.

Now that his high school sports career has come to an end, it is easy to see that. In time, the proper perspective has set in. Hopefully, it will also registered for those other frustrated parents out there.

But I’m pretty sure that there is no hope for those parents who jumped that Muckers coach.

— Bill Foley, who is really going to miss being a high school sports dad, can be reached at foles74@gmail.com. Follow him at twitter.com/Foles74 or Bluesky at @foles74.bsky.social. Listen to him on the ButteCast on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or wherever you find your favorite podcasts.